Shitty Stories

I was on the way to a movie theater and the stomach pains hit me. I worked at a building nearby so I decided that would be my best option. I got to the building and could not get in so I went for the next best thing - the staircase. As I'm relieving myself the night custodian comes by and sees me pouring hot, putrid ass water on to the cement. Apparently, the horrified look on my face or perhaps the odor scared him off because he got out of there real quick. When I finished I took a look at the ground and couldn't help but feel sorry for the poor bastard because I am sure he had to clean it up. The following day I could not resist the urge to return to the scene of the crime. Upon arrival I noticed that acid and bile from my dump had etched a stain into the cement. It was pretty amazing. I wonder what I ate? Must have been Mexican.