Shit pants in front of a cop

I am sitting in English class and I tell the teacher that I have to go the washroom. I make it to the washroom with no problem at all, just the normal cramping that happens when your bowels senses porceline. I open stall one and see the toilet is overflowed and shit everywhere so I go to stall two. Amazing enough stall two has shit everywhere from stall one's overflow. At this point have to make decision. Do I use the handicap bathroom or dart for home while I still can and then after catch a nap. I choose home. I live 25 minute bus-ride at best from school, but it's the choice I made.

I finally make it to my stop with my ass clinched so hard that I can barely walk across the street. I get to my house and go down the back alley to the back door (We never used the front). I get to my house and push my door open to run upstairs but it's LOCKED!!! My mom had gone out and I didnt have a damn key. In a panic I dash to the living room window which is adjacent to the back door and I fling it open and just as I am about to climb in, cops on a routine back alley drive pull up and sound the "Whoop Whoop" on me. The cop gets out and I start to explain: "Dude, this is my house I live here I was at school had to go to the bathroom but my mom is not home and if you don't let me go I am going to do it in my pants."
In response the cop said: "Ok, let's just see your ID to prove it's address and your on your way"
As he was speaking....SPLAT!!!!!! IN MY PANTS AND DOWN MY LEG. TO MAKE THINGS WORSE A LOG ROLLS OUT STOPPING ABOUT 3 INCHES FROM MR OFFICER SHIT BLOCKERS BLACK BOOT. He looks at me, turns around, and walks back to the car dry heaving. I am pissed at this time so I said the hell with and finish my shit right in front of the other cop because his partner blocked me from doing this in private. When I am finished I reach into my back pocket for my ID and the cop says, "I believe you" and flies off...